Cancer and Eating Whataburgers in the Car

Yesterday I sat in my car in Target's parking lot, eating a hamburger and thinking wistfully about my dad.

Dad died April 1, 2004 of esophageal cancer. I was down in Texas taking care of him back then. In the months preceding his death, a tumor in his esophagus left him unable to swallow anything that could not fit through a straw. This made eating quite a challenge. If that wasn’t bad enough, Dad also suffered from dementia (possibly from cancer in his brain) so he really didn’t understand or remember that he had to be very careful about what he ate.

Consequently, anytime we were eating together we'd eat only liquids or something super soft that could fit down his obstructed esophagus. His favorite, his “comfort food”, was Milk Toast, which if you’re not an "old timer" from Texas you may think that is just a term used to describe a wimp. Milk Toast is hot milk poured over buttery toast, and really not too bad, but it's not getting featured on the Food Channel anytime soon, either. Most of the time the Jell-O, soup etc. was fine and a good reminder to me of what Dad was going through, how much he'd lost to not be able to even eat normally.

Occasionally though, I'd get really hungry for some "chewable" food and sneak off to get a "Whataburger". The first time I did it, I sat in the restaurant and ate. When I walked into the house an hour later Dad asked me where the hamburgers. He could smell them from my clothes.

After that, whenever I would get the burger buzz, I'd used the drive-thru, then I'd park a block or so away from home and eat in the car. After I finished, I'd bury the trash outside under what was already in the can and leave the car windows open to make sure there was no burger aroma to give me away.

It was one of those sad/funny/guilt inducing things that you do when someone you love has cancer and you're the primary caregiver. As I sat in the car back then, I'd feel silly and guilty, with my heart aching because of what Dad was going through.

The worst was probably dealing with the dementia. Dad couldn't remember why he couldn't eat or what the problem was. It was a constant struggle, but we were blessed with a strong and loving relationship of trust in each other and God got us through that oh, so difficult time. As hard as it was, it was also one of the greatest blessing of my life to be able to give back to my father just a fraction of the loving care he'd always given to me.

Today my dad is in heaven, healed, and eating heavenly hamburgers every day I suspect.

I'd like to ask you a favor. If your dad is still here, please give him a big hug or send him a loving e-mail for me today.

My Review of RUSH by Jonathan Friesen

RUSH

By Jonathan Friesen

RUSH is the latest young adult novel of my friend Jonathan Friesen. I was lucky enough to get an advanced copy to read. His first novel “Jerk, California”, a road trip/coming of age story of a teen who just happens to have Tourette Syndrome won the American Library Association Schneider Family Award.

“He could burn. She could die.
Anything for the rush.”

These words from the cover of Rush are a fairly accurate ten word description of the RUSH.

18-year-old Jake King is the kind of teen who gives parents sleepless nights and frantic days. Never one to sit still for a minute, Jake’s idea of a perfect afternoon begins with blowing off school to play “Spiderman” by rock climbing up a sheer walled canyon in a thunderstorm. Along the way, Jake rescues an 8 year-old stuck half-way up the canyon wall. Then instead of a bedtime story, Jake scales the local water tower for a late night dangle.

AD/HD, E/BD are just a few of the initials used to describe adrenalin junkie Jake’s constant quest for thrills.

But there is more to Jake than just action. His best friend Salome Lee knows a side of Jake that no one else is permitted to see. Ever since they were 8 years old and he climbed the rope ladder at school to rescue her locket, his tender friendship and loyalty have been calling to Salome’s heart, causing her to overlook most of Jake’s crazy stunts. Their relationship is complicated further by Jake’s fear that if he lets Salome get too close he’ll only break her heart.

Just when it seems Jake has worn out his welcome at school and his father’s patience at home an opportunity comes up that seems perfect for Jake’s unique skill set. The local crew of hotshot forest firefighters has an opening. These are the guys who rappel into wildfires, smoke jumpers who parachute into the belly of the beast to pull out its fiery teeth. Jake can just see himself in one of those leather jackets with “The Immortals” stitched on the back. Never mind that these guys have a habit of dying young.

But there is more to “The Immortals” than Jake knows. “According to legend, each year at least one member of the underground firefighters’ brotherhood must die.” But dead firemen never speak and the living “Immortals” are just as tight-lipped. All of which appeals to Jake even more.

RUSH is a fast paced story with a full serving of action and a side dish of mystery seasoned sweetly with romance. Jonathan’s writing will have you feeling the heat from the firefighting scenes and heart-pounding excitement as you follow Jake’s “live large or die” philosophy of life. This plot and these characters are well-written and interesting, getting into your head and keeping you turning pages long past bedtime.

So if you’re a reader who likes your action with a little lovin’ or your romance with a touch of danger, RUSH to Amazon and put in your pre-order because RUSH doesn’t release until June 10, 2010.


Check out the book trailer at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2LkZzI7VJ8 or below!


The “Skinny” on RUSH (what I really loved)

• The nice/tough guy character of Jake. He’s a high-risk, adrenaline-loving troubled kid trying to do the right thing.
• Jake’s descriptions of how AD/HD affects his mind.
• Sweet & sassy Salome, an strong, independent young woman who’s not sitting around waiting for a “knight in shining armor.”
• The story setting in the California wildfire region, exploring the exploits of men who risk their lives fighting out of control fires.
• Mystery of “The Immortals,” firefighters’ secret club.
• It's a fast-paced page-turner.
• Really FEELING the rush as Jake risks everything, jumping bikes, fighting fires and scaling rock walls all for the thrill of it.
  

"Age before Beauty" by Virginia Smith

What fun I'm having in my search for new authors and new books to read! I discovered Ginny Smith when I noticed her name listed on the faculty of the Quad-Cities Writers Conference, which is directed by my friend and boss Twila Belk. (You can check us out online at www.qccwc.com. Conference this year is April 9-10 in Eldridge, Iowa. We'd love to see you).

I saw Virginia’s book listed on her face book page and not realizing it was the second in the Sister-to-Sister series I began reading "Age before Beauty". Well, thank you Ginny for a real treat!

When I say Ginny's characters and the difficulties they face remind me of Karen Kingsbury, I am giving her the very highest of compliments! It's almost like finding a new "Baxter family" to get to know!

Allie is in love with her baby daughter, her handsome husband and her loving supportive family. So what could possibly the problem?
As Allie approaches the end of her maternity leave she finds the idea of leaving her newborn with "strangers" is more than she can handle and when an opportunity to work from home presents itself, Allie jumps in determined to be the best salesperson the Varie Cose home party company has ever had!

If these changes weren't enough Allie comes home from the initial party to find standing in her kitchen her taciturn mother-in-law, "the only person in the entire world who hated her guts." Turns out "Mom" has left her husband and is moving in.
This is an entertaining, current story with believable, likeable characters whose struggles and how they handled them were in turn funny, touching and inspirational.

Read "Age before Beauty". I promise you'll be entertained, touched and maybe even shed a few tears. And if you're like me, you'll be reading more in the Sister-to-sister series.”

How One Ripped Page Changed a Life By James Pence

I did not write my post today. It is used by permission and is the amazing true story of how God used a page from a novel to reach the heart of a man broken over the murder of his family. Even more heart wrenching is the fact that it is the true story of a man, Terry Caffey, who lost his wife, 2 sons, and his house - all at the hands of his teenage daughter.

The story of this horrific crime and the struggle of a father to forgive the unthinkable is available in the new book Terror By Night by Terry Caffey (the father) and James Pence.

James Pence, the author of the novel and of this article, is one of the keynote speakers for the 2010 Quad-Cities Christian Writers Conference, April 9-10 in Eldridge, Iowa. For more information about the conference, check out our website http://www.qccwc.com

How One Ripped Page Changed a Life By James Pence

Recently, I heard an amazing story of how God used my novel, Blind Sight, to turn someone's life around. After hearing this story, even if I never sell another book, I'll feel fulfilled as a writer.

At about 3 a.m. on March 1st of last year, two young men broke into Terry Caffey's home in Emory, Texas. They shot Terry and killed his wife, Penney, and then went upstairs and murdered the Caffey's two young sons, Bubba and Tyler. They then set fire to the house and left the family for dead. Although he had been shot twelve times, Terry escaped through the bathroom window and crawled three hundred yards to a neighbor's house. To make matters worse, Terry's daughter Erin was implicated in the crime. Overnight, Terry Caffey lost his entire family.

A month or so later, Terry went back to his property. The remains of the house had been bulldozed and little was left. Torn with grief, Terry was contemplating suicide. Unable to understand why God had taken his family and allowed him to survive, Terry cried out to God, "Why did you take my family? Why didn't you take me, too? I don't understand."

As he stood there, Terry noticed a burned scrap of paper standing up against the trunk of a nearby tree. He went over and picked it up. The paper was part of a page from my novel, Blind Sight. The edges of the page were scorched and it was difficult to read. But the words were like a direct message to Terry from God.

Here's the portion of text that Terry found:

[The viewpoint character in these paragraphs is Thomas Kent, a man who lost his wife and children in an automobile accident that he survived. In this scene, Thomas is praying.]
"I couldn't understand why You would take my family and leave me behind to struggle along without them. And I guess I still don't totally understand that part of it. But I do believe that You're sovereign; You're in control."

Justine's voice reverberated through his thoughts: Maybe God knew we needed you.

"And I know that You've brought Justine and those children into my life. And they need me. Lord, You could have taken my life that day, but You spared it. And You've gone on sparing it. It doesn't matter what happens to me now, but if I can help them, please let me do it."

Thomas closed the drapes and stood alone in the dark room. For the first time in two years, he was at peace with God and with himself. He knew what he had to do. Justine and her children would be safe, even if he had to die to make sure of it.

Those paragraphs turned Terry's life around. He found the strength to go on, and is now sharing his testimony in churches around the country. When he speaks, he brings the page from my novel, now preserved in a frame, and shows it to the congregation.

Because the page was only partially preserved, Terry didn't know what book it had come from until a few weeks ago. He spoke one Sunday morning at Greenville Bible Church, and my daughter, Charlene, was present in the congregation. [She and Terry's daughter, Erin, are good friends.] Charlene and Terry both had lunch at pastor Jim Corbet's house, and Terry told them that he'd love to find out which book the page had come from. The pastor and his wife had both read Blind Sight and they thought they recognized the passage. Charlene agreed that it sounded like it had come from my novel. Pastor Corbet took his copy of Blind Sight down and they eventually found the page.

That same afternoon, Terry called and shared the story with me. Tears streamed down my face as I listened to a story that is nothing short of a miracle of God's providence. Not only had the house burned, but the site had been long since cleaned up and the debris bulldozed and hauled off. What little material was left had been exposed to the weather for at least a month. And out of a nearly 400-page book, the only scrap that remained was a brief passage where a man who had lost a wife and two children came to grips with the sovereign goodness of God, submitted to His will, and decided to move forward.

That scrap of paper lay there against a tree trunk as if waiting for Terry Caffey: a man who had lost his wife and two sons, a man who was in deep despair and who was contemplating suicide, a man who desperately needed to come to grips with the sovereign goodness and mercy of God.
Needless to say, I am deeply humbled to have been the one who wrote the words that God chose to use. What an incredible, awesome God we serve!

--Is that amazing or what?

James H. Pence is the founder of Tuppence Creative Ministries, an outreach that encourages excellence in the arts for the glory of God. In addition to being the author of six books, James is a performance chalk artist and vocalist.

Terry Caffey's website is at: http://www.terrycaffey.com/

About the author

James H. Pence is a full-time professional writer and editor living near Dallas, Texas. James is a multi-talented writer who has been published in both fiction and nonfiction. His publishers include Tyndale House, Kregel, and Osborne/McGraw-Hill. James holds a master’s degree in Biblical Studies with an emphasis in creative writing and journalism from Dallas Theological Seminary. He also holds a bachelor’s degree in theology from Dallas Bible College. James is also a vocalist and gospel chalk artist, and he regularly uses his talents to share the gospel in prisons.

James is the author of Blind Sight, a gripping novel about mind-control cults and coauthor (along with Terry Caffey) of the new book: Terror by Night: The True Story of the Brutal Texas Murder that Destroyed a Family, Restored One Man’s Faith, and Shocked a Nation.

Used by permission

Cardinal Cafe

I love watching the cardinals and other birds eating each day, right outside me office window. I recently bought some new bird seed called "Cardinal's Choice" and dining at the Cardinal Cafe in my backyard has been standing room only. I tell you the customers are really flocking in to try my little Michelin five star hot spot on these cold winter mornings. And the only squawking has been over the choice seating at the one table I have.

This morning I opened the door for "breakfast service" and there in the fresh snow were tiny little bird tracks leading right up to my back door as if to say "Hey, where's breakfast? I'm hungry." It was obvious the early bird had been there and not finding any unfrozen worms or fresh seed had hopped up see what the problem was.

As I looked at those tiny tracks and pictured such a frail creature approaching my ginormous door to get his needs met, into my head popped a picture of ME, approaching the throne of our almighty God.

Here I go, tiny, impotent, frail, but up I boldly hop on my skinny little bird legs and before the God of all Creation start twittering about my needs and when they're going to be met and what the problem is. How my loving Father must smile at my chirping and shake His head at my squawking, knowing all the time the good plans He has for me for a Hope and a Future.

Thank you Lord for lessons and reminders in small things, for patiently reassuring us in Your word of Your constant care and love. Thank You for the wonders of creation and for speaking to my heart from it's simply awesome/awesomely simple beauty.

Luke 12:24 (NLT) Look at the birds. They don’t need to plan or harvest or put food in barns because God feeds them. And you are far more valuable to Him than any birds.

God sees the little sparrow fall,
It meets His tender view;
If God so loves the little birds,
I know He loves me, too.

He loves me, too, He loves me, too,
I know He loves me, too;
Because He loves the little things,
I know He loves me, too.

He paints the lily of the field,
Perfumes each lily bell;
If He so loves the little flow’rs,
I know He loves me well.

God made the little birds and flow’rs,
And all things large and small;
He’ll not forget his little ones,
I know He loves them all.

Ma­ria Straub, 1874

Not Your Mama's Writing Conference

“I wrote, she wrote, we all wrote”. We also learned and laughed, talked and listened to great authors (some bestsellers), took notes and got critiqued. And then we ate and “coffee talked” and made some great life-long friends, all at the Quad-Cities Christian Writers Conference.

It's been a lot of fun writing about wonderful books this year, but it's a lot more fun to see positive comments about your own writing. Just imagine a big cardboard box arriving at the door. You open it up and see the cover of your very first published book. If that is a dream of yours, then read on, my friend.

If you’re looking for insight into the publishing industry, have questions about getting published or marketing your finished work, or just need some plain old-fashioned encouragement on your writing journey, QCCWC is the conference for you. From all over the country authors and participants gather to share ideas, to spend time together finding and giving help and encouragement in a conference unique because of its heart. Over and over again we've received feedback from people sharing comments like:
"There's a different Spirit at this conference".
"I didn't know the authors and teachers would be so accessible."
"I can't wait to try out what I've learned."
"Thank you for such a wonderful conference!"
We hope you'll take time to come and see for yourself the difference two short days can make in your writing and in your life.

From the website:
"The Quad-Cities Christian Writers' Conference is pleased to announce that some of the best writing instructors in the nation will join us in 2010 for two full days of breakout sessions, continuing sessions, keynote talks, one-on-one appointments, and inspiration.

In order to make an impact with your writing, it's important to LEARN THE CRAFT. That's what the Quad-Cities Christian Writers' Conference is all about. You won't find publishers, agents, and editors in attendance, but you will experience the care and coaching of a professional, knowledgeable staff. Our faculty will answer your questions, guide you, teach you, and show you how you can use your writing to change the world one word at a time."

Join us April 9-10 in Eldridge, Iowa. It could be your first step toward the thrill of seeing your work in print. For more information or to register go to http://www.qccwc.com/

I'll be looking for you!

The special early-bird rate for registrations postmarked or electronically submitted on or before Saturday, February 20!

She Gave All She Had

Last week was our turn to teach the Pre-K-K class for Sunday School. It's a lively group and we always enjoy it. Sunday, we had about 20, but they were so busy it seemed like more. The lesson was about following directions, but it seems like the Spirit was teaching a different lesson in the heart of one little girl.

About halfway into the morning, we take time to sing and praise the Lord and to take up the offering. I invited the kids who'd remembered to bring their offerings to go to the plastic bucket we use and put in their money. As they headed back to their seats, little Brielle came and looked up at me.

"I don't have any offering," she said.

"That's okay, Brielle, you can bring it next week." I replied and she scurried back to her chair.

A few moments later she found me again. This time she was holding a long pink balloon, one of those you can twist into animals and hats. She'd had it all morning and it was now only half filled with air.

"Here," she said brightly, a wide smile on her face, "This balloon is for God!"

Together we took the balloon over and put it in the bucket. I'm sure it made Jesus smile to see a bright pink balloon on top of all the pennies, quarters, bills and envelopes already there.

"I think God is very happy you gave him your balloon," I told Brielle as she happily took her seat again. One little girl gave all that she had that morning, joyfully and with all her heart because she wanted to give to God.

"... and a little child shall lead them."

Lord, may I be as cheerful and generous and pure a giver as this little one.